1.Money is not everything. There‘s Mastercard & Visa.
钞票不是万能的,有时还需要信用卡.
2.One should love animals. They are so tasty.
每个人都应该热爱动物,因为它们很好吃.
3.Love the neighbor. But don‘t get caught.
要用心去爱你的邻居,不过不要让她的老公知道.
4.Behind every successful man, there is a woman. And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.
每个成功男人的背后都有一个女人，每个不成功男人的背后都有两个女人。
5.Every man should marry. After all, happiness is not the only thing in life.
再快乐的单身汉迟早也会结婚,幸福不是永久的嘛.
6.The wise never marry, And when they marry they become otherwise.
聪明人都是未婚的,结婚的人很难再聪明起来.
7.Success is a relative term. It brings so many relatives.
成功是一个相关名词,他会给你带来很多不相关的亲戚（联系）.
8.Never put off the work till tomorrow what you can put off today.
不要等明天交不上差再找借口, 今天就要找好.
9.Love is photogenic. It needs darkness to develop.
爱情就象照片,需要大量的暗房时间来培养.
10.Children in backseats cause accidents. Accidents in backseats cause children.
后排座位上的小孩会生出意外, 后排座位上的意外会生出小孩.
11."Your future depends on your dreams." So go to sleep.
"现在的梦想决定着你的将来",所以还是再睡一会吧.
12.There should be a better way to start a day than waking up every morning.
应该有更好的方式开始新一天,而不是千篇一律的在每个上午都醒来.
13."Hard work never kills anybody." But why take the risk? "
努力工作不会导致死亡!"不过我不会用自己去证明.
14."Work fascinates me." I can look at it for hours! "
工作好有意思耶!"尤其是看着别人工作.
15.God made relatives; Thank God we can choose our friends.
神决定了谁是你的亲戚,幸运的是在选择朋友方面他给了你留了余地。
16.When two‘s company, three‘s the result!
两个人的状态是不稳定的,三个人才是!
17.A dress is like a barbed fence. It protects the premises without restricting the view.
服饰就象铁丝网,它阻止你冒然行动，但并不妨碍你尽情地观看.
18.Themore you learn, the more you know, The more you know, the more youforget. The more you forget, the less you know. So why bother to learn.
学的越多,知道的越多, 知道的越多；忘记的越多, 忘记的越多；知道的越少, 为什么学来着?!
1、When two's company, three's the result!
两个人的状态是不稳定的，三个人才是!
2、Children in backseats cause accidents. Accidents in backseats cause children.
后排座位上的小孩会生出意外，后排座位上的意外会生出小孩。
3、God made relatives; Thank God we can choose our friends.
神决定了谁是你的亲戚，幸运的是在选择朋友方面他给了你留了余地。
4、There should be a better way to start a day than waking up every morning.
应该有更好的`方式开始新一天，而不是千篇一律的在每个上午都醒来。
5、Never put off the work till tomorrow what you can put off today.
不要等明天交不上差再找借口，今天就要找好。
6、Success is a relative term. It brings so many relatives.
成功是一个相关名词，他会给你带来很多不相关的亲戚(联系)。
7、A dress is like a barbed fence. It protects the premises without restricting the view.
服饰就象铁丝网，它阻止你冒然行动但并不妨碍你尽情的观看。
8、Every man should marry. After all, happiness is not the only thing in life.
再快乐的单身汉迟早也会结婚，幸福不是永久的嘛。
9、Love is photogenic. It needs darkness to develop.
爱情就象照片，需要大量的暗房时间来培养。
10、The wise never marry, And when they marry they become otherwise.
聪明人都是未婚的，结婚的人很难再聪明起来。
11、One should love animals. They are so tasty.
每个人都应该热爱动物，因为它们很好吃。
12、The more you learn, the more you know, The more you know, the more you forget. The more you forget, the less you know. So why bother to learn.
学的越多，知道的越多，知道的越多，忘记的越多，忘记的越多，知道的越少，为什么学来着?
13、Money is not everything. There's Mastercard Visa.
钞票不是万能的，有时还需要信用卡。
14、Save water. Shower with your girlfriend.
要节约用水，尽量和女友一起洗澡。
15、Behind every successful man, there is a woman. And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.
每个成功男人的背后，都有一个女人。每个不成功男人的背后，都有两个。
16、Work fascinates me. I can look at it for hours!
“工作好有意思耶!”尤其是看着别人工作。
17、Hard work never killed anybody. But why take the risk .
“努力工作不会导致死亡!”不过我不会用自己去证明。
18、Love the neighbor. But don't get caught.
要用心去爱你的邻居，不过不要让她的老公知道。
我们班的英语课总是笑料百出，最近英语课的语法讲的是关于第三人称单数的.问题，上课时常简单的说“三单”，没有想到一个简单的语法知识也能在我们班闹出笑话。
先问一个：SHE是三单还是非三单？那位同学愣了一下响亮回答：非三单。全班哄堂大笑，那位同学害羞的坐下。老师再次耐心的讲了一遍正确答案，并详细解释三单和非三单的差别后，又叫另一个同学站起来回答：Mary后面接do还是dose？那同学不假思索的回答：do。老师还没有反应过来，全班又开始大笑，那位同学尴尬的坐下。老师都讲过好多遍了，不知道他们的脑袋是否短路了。
老师接下来复习以前讲过的语法：Like+Ving形式，这也是讲过很多次的东西。老师点后排的一位同学回答：Like+V_什么形式。他前排的一个同学回头用口型告诉他，他竟然不想别人说的对不对，就响亮的回答+原形，全班又炸开锅。过来几分钟后，老师再次点名问他同一个问题Like+V_什么形式，他想了一下，回答：原...啊不，ing形式。脑袋总算开窍了，可还是受到了全体大笑的“奖励”... ...
我们班的英语课总是在搞笑中度过，想想辛苦的是老师，一个超级简单的问题也要反反复复说好多次。
