233.提供点食物,不要让人难咽

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233.提供点食物,不要让人难咽

提供点食物,不要让人难咽。否则,别人会感到难受,而不是感激。有些人想帮助别人,结果却惹人生气,因为他们没有想到彼此品味的不同。同一种做法,对一个人来说是恭维,对另一个人来说却是冒犯。想要帮助他人,却可能让人感觉受伤。让人恼怒比让人高兴往往要付出更大的代价:你既送了礼,又得不到感谢,因为你丢失了驾驭快乐的方向盘。如果你不知道别人的口味,就不知道怎样取悦别人。因此,总会发生这种情况:许多人本来想赞美别人,却被人当成侮辱,从而反遭侮辱;还有人想通过谈吐展示魅力,结果却因为多嘴而惹人讨厌。

233.Let not the proffered morsel be distasteful

Let not the proffered morsel be distasteful; otherwise it gives more discomfort than pleasure. Some displease when attempting to oblige, because they take no account of varieties of taste. What is flattery to one is an offence to another, and in attempting to be useful one may become insulting. It often costs more to displease a man than it would have cost to please him: you thereby lose both gift and thanks because you have lost the compass which steers for pleasure. If you do not know another's taste, you do not know how to please him. Thus it happens that many insult where they mean to praise, and get soundly punished, and rightly so. Others desire to charm by their conversation, and only succeed in boring by their loquacity.